The Office Productivity Index - Astrology is an exact Science

In light of the upcoming changes in the company organisation structure and the fact that, if at all it is even remotely conceivable, i am very soon going to be even more workless. (or as normal people would say, i'm going to have even less work to do) So i have decided to stop working from today onwards.
I mean, hey, its gonna take a while for me to adjust to the additional lack of work, so i'm just going to use this time now to slowly begin adjusting myself to this new lifestyle.
For those who i haven't grumbled about this to already - tis a bit like this

Life as it is now:
I come in to work at 9, and by 10 i have finished my work for the day. Between facebook, this blog, chatting with other folks who have nothing to do, making long distance phone calls on the company account, and surfing the net for random things, i spend the rest of the day (i.e. 10 am to 5.30pm) looking for work - new ideas, ways to make things better. There's only so much of talking and surfing you can do in a day. And that gets mind numbingly boring if you do it everyday. A girls gotta have something to do - even if it is actually working, and earning my keep, so to say

Life as it will be come mid Nov:
The astrologers have predicted that supposedly more responsibility will come my way. My translation of this awesome prediction is i'm going to have lesser work to do. While Lateralus has tried convincing me that "they'll give you more work" i have a theory on this as well (its a bit strange calling you that, by the way, you might want to consider changing it maybe? Denny Crane?)
Theory: The new "more " work is no work at all, atleast for me!!! Its what others can (and will) make a day out of and i'll still finish by 10 am. (Yes, I AM THAT GOOD AT IT) Therein lies the problem, my friend.
With the new fancy changes, 'new ideas for improvement' isn't supposed to be what i should be doing. And the idea of sitting here from 10 - 5 twiddling my thumbs is no longer appealing, even remotely.
Strange thoughts have been cropping up in this idle-mind-which-is-a-devils-workshop lately.
Like:
- I wonder what it feels like to actually have work to do
- Should i abandon my no work but all pay job and look for something else?
- Does Buffy the Vampire Slayer still run on TV?
- I wonder what it feels like to actually have work to do

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Something is very wrong with the world this week...

....My world that is
Other than the continuing financial crisis and investment banks rolling over sooner than you can say Bazoookaaa!!! (word for the week?)
(every one wants to join in before this goes outta fashion it seems)

Okie, to get back on track...so other than the money matters and the mild powder being bad because the Chinese didn't know they were poisoning us (or did they?)... i sent out 35 e-mails at work yesterday (notice how i broke it in very subtly)
It would be the most productive day of my employment - not since my imprisonment in logistics where i had to work 25-hour days have i done this much of work without even realising it.
You can understand the enormity of this situation when you realise that most days i average at about 10 mails a day - OK, OK.. actually there are some days i send only 1 or 2 e-mails
So 35 is a whoppingly big number... this overshadows Lehman Brothers problems even...
As president of the lazy club (yes Lateralus, i made myself president while you were busy working) this is a serious issue which is turning my productivity Topsy-turvy (Topsy-turvy was runner up for word of the week)

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAnnndddd just when you thought it couldn't get any worse than this... its been only 2 hours at work today and I've already sent 20 e-mails out already. At this rate, this is going to be an even more productive day than yesterday (Holy atomic pile, Batman!!!)
Don't worry Mom, I'm not over exerting myself or any fancy jazz like that.. in fact, i didn't even know what a day yesterday was until i came to work today.

But ..but... transitioning from being someone who comes late to work at 9:15 and is done for the day by 10:00 am, and spends the rest of the day with puzzles, facebook and novels (Yes, I've started reading novels at work... unashamedly... not online, but paperbacks.. One of the perks of being manager i call it..) to now being someone who doesn't even realise that I'm putting in so much work in a day they're likely to create a character for me on Heroes... well the transition has strangely not been realised by me at all. But. It will be rebelled against..
A "Change We Can Believe In" ?? I think not.

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Eat less red meat to help the environment, UN climate expert says

People should eat less red meat if they want to help combat the effects of climate change, a leading United Nations expert said.
This made new yesterday morning.. and I found this article on the Telegraph site.
I don't intend to comment on this article.. but you need to go to the article and read the comments everyone else has posted there.. very very 'informative' if one can use that word.

Some excerpts:

"What would be even more useful for the planet is if he and other experts were to stop emitting carbon dioxide."

"So they have started on methane The will ban us farting next."

"Does praying in a kneeling/prostrate position affect climate change? "

"The eco-religions are putting us in danger by shifting focus from the real issue of our time... energy security. I for one, do not trust Russia one iota."

"I'd say, eat less vegetables because they give you so much more gas than meat or fish. The computer model used to "prove" climate change by man must be fantastic. Can it tell us about tomorrow,s weather?"

and then... this gem

"Bloody hopeless, most of you. Do you ever think beyond your own selfish wants? Why are you so quick to condemn a scientist who wants to improve the quality of life on earth? Well, go on then, hide your heads in the sand. Thick as bricks, you are. "

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